And as surprised as I was, I found..
I hadn't gone bald and grey overnight! I neither suddenly need to use a Zimmer frame or miraculously found my trousers reached my nipples!!
.. I still had to survey the damage suffered, (by 40 years of debauchery) in the bathroom mirror..
And let me tell you.. It wasn't a pretty sight first thing..
This got me thinking.....
- I'm 40!! Eeeek!
- I'm not immortal
- S**t 40!
- I don't wanna get old!!
- 40!
- That Dorian bloke, who sold me the portrait I have stashed in my attic.... BLOODY CONNED ME!!
- Aaaaaaaaaarrrrrrrrrrgggggggghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!
& when I stopped hyperventilating.. I made a decision......
I'm not gunna take it! Old is for... Errrrr! Old People!!??
so, I've instructed clever white coated boffins at SSB Enterprises to look into Life Extensions and Elixirs of Youth. I then set up the Department of Elixirs, Age & Total Health who quickly sloped of to consult the Oracles, the fonts of all wisdom that are drunken Irish builders(#1) at the local pub..
Many bevies later and slurring. They promptly (A-Hum) returned & announced the news "O'Malley recons He can do you an extension........."
".....BUT...... He can't start till after new year!(#2)"
Damn!! Research Continues........
#1) They know everything! (well.. so they claim, in very loud obnoxious voices)
#2) No mention of what year was made! although, strangely.. I now have a newly tarmacked drive and cant seam to find the lead roof?!?
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1 comment:
Happy birthday you oldish thing here is a gem to make u feel better, you have only 10 years before your fifty so that means you can act an idiot until then (peeps understand, just say im in my 40s)it wil be the best ten years of your life
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